Yesterday I woke up very early.
Actually, I was woken up by a symphony of birds living in the tree outside of the condo we are renting in Maui. Steve and I, along with our sweet little baby are starting the second half of a month in Hawaii. The next two weeks will be our official vacation. No work or meetings for him, no teaching or course creation for me. If we feel like working on our various creative projects we can, but the focus will be on renewal and adventure.
We got up early and had a two hour class with our inspiring meditation teacher trainees and I spent most of the day finishing work, accompanied by Audrey laying beside me on the patio enjoying the endless birdsong.
I don't say this to make you feel jealous (especially my beloved Canadian friends who are all telling me how cold it is at home right now) but this is my personal heaven. I am beyond grateful to be here right now, in this place, at this point in my life, living my dreams.
I wanted to share this with you because there is a magic in making this trip happen that deals in the domain of yoga and I hope that my contemplation might help you make your own dreams come true, on and off the mat.
Now it must first be said that this precious time is possible because of the privilege I have been able to enjoy. I am a western-born, Caucasian woman with access to education, health care and the resources I needed to build a successful business as a yoga instructor. I also had the freedom to pack up, move to another country and not have to worry about bills during my pregnancy or at this point in my daughters life. I take none of that for granted, and while my privilege opens certain doors, something was missing.
Last year at this time, I was feeling stuck. Even though I had just published my first book, I was living in the middle of a record breaking snowfall year in Boston. The yoga community I had hoped to find there was eluding me. I was newly pregnant and felt weak and ill most of the time. Not only that, but I had fears around becoming a parent that many people experience: will my baby be healthy? will I be a good mother? will she love me? will I know what to do? how will my marriage be after the birth?
In the midst of all of it, I said to Steve (probably in tears): "Next year I don't want to be here for the winter. Can we just spend February in Hawaii?"
He said: "Why not?!"
Steve knows how to dream.
It was a huge perspective shift for me and ironically I had to exercise the advice I give to my yoga students on a regular basis before I learned how to dream again.
Here is what I mean: when someone comes to yoga for the first time, they may have a certain dream or intention of where they would like the practice to take them. This could be physical, spiritual, mental or emotional.The challenge is that their positive intention is commonly wrapped in a thick skin of limitation and doubt.
Sometimes the perceived limitations are valid. The student may be inflexible or have structural weaknesses. More difficult however are the limitations that are completely self-imposed and are only made true by how deeply the student is holding on to them. They have decided for one reason or another that they are a slow learner, too clumsy or even the wrong "type" of person for yoga.
Perhaps you have suffered through this yourself.
Through a set of rigid limitations your ability to dream was squashed. Not only that, but you were so encased in your views about yourself that you guaranteed your ongoing stagnation.
As a teacher, my intention on the mat is to help people prove they are capable of something they thought was previously impossible. Yoga being a microcosm for you and your life allows an opening in those moments. When you touch your toes for the first time after swearing you would never get there or hold downward dog for a full minute comfortably after believing you were "weak" there is an opening and a paradigm shift that can take place is you let it.
Suddenly your belief that you aren't flexible or strong comes into question and you are faced with the possibility that you have changed something fundamentally or perhaps that you may have been wrong to assume you were capable of less in the first place.
That little magical opening is the space needed to dream.
The door is open, something new is possible and you can either decide to investigate or slam the door.
You can do this off the mat. Maybe it is a month or a year off to travel, maybe it is changing your career or finding a partner or getting a puppy. Your dream is yours and you are free to dream it without making assumptions about why it can never happen.
Personally, my dream is to be part of a thoughtful and supportive community. I want Audrey to be loved and welcomed as much when we travel as when we are together in our home. In many ways, I feel like Dorothy clicking her heels when I say with tremendous pleasure that in March we will be back in Canada. I will be teaching in Hamilton a few days a week at my yoga home De La Sol as well as in Kitchener/ Waterloo.
Stay tuned for more, but in the mean time share your stories of breakthrough dreams come true—even if they're still in process, or just forming—in the comments below.
